whoever might read this, my name is lucy webbersmith, my fiancé evan lancer and i came up following the bluehorn trail august seventeenth, 2023. we came prepared for the hike, we had done it before. neither me nor my fiancé are unusually susceptible to elevation sickness. neither of us have a history of psychosis, drug use, ect. we were both of sound mind and body when we came here. whatever happened up here happened because this fucking place has something very wrong with it and that wasnt my fault and i couldnt possibly have known because if i did i never wouldve dragged him up here. i dont even know if anyone is going to read this. my phone'll probably be soaked thru with rainwater by the time they find me. if they find me. oh god. theyre going to find me.
to whoever may be reading this, i dont know where i am. i dont know where the fuck i am. im an experienced hiker, im not some fucking novice coming up here with no map expecting to just be able to find my way and be fine or whatever. im not fucking stupid and i never wandered off from the path, neither of us did. we didnt set a foot outside of that bleeding thing. like i said ive done this trail before - i was with my dad that time - and it was fine. it was nice. so i took evan up here cause i thought itd be nice again but it clearly fucking was not. we noticed - i noticed - the trail was wrong almost immediately. it started branching in ways that werent on the map. leading us to unmarked routes. we turned around immediately. like i said, im not fucking stupid and i know not to go prancing off into the wilderness. but if we'd taken a wrong turn, it mustve happened at the very start cause no matter what direction we went all we found were more branching paths rhat werent on the map. i swear to god i retraced our steps but our steps were different. where we had come from the path had split and everything was different and i didnt know what to do. what could i do? what would you have done, reader? would you have magically found your way back? would you not have gotten lost in the first place? fuck you. we did everything right and evan still died and i still got stuck up on this mountain that shouldnt exist with his body and no way to get down. i tried taking a picture but its so misty here my camera fogged up immediately. i think. it is misty here, i mean. im soaked. i dont know. it just looked... odd. who gives a shit. dear whoever is reading this: evan is dead. my fiancé is dead. i killed him. i bashed his head in with a rock until he stopped being able to scream - but that still didnt stop him from trying. im not a killer. i love evan. i loved him. but he wasnt evan anymore. dear reader, beware, there is something that lives within those branching pathsways and that cloying fog that surrounds this place. we kept walking up routes that shouldnt exist, past the point where the tip of the mountain should be. were too high up. we shouldnt be here. we came to a cliffside, a sheer drop down though we couldnt see the ground anymore, just a pale haze as the nothingness bled into the mist. i let out a kind of cough-sob, and turned to him for comfort, but whatever evan used to be was dead. i could see it in his eyes. he looked at me, and he told me to jump. i want to say his voice was unnaturally deep or wasnt his anymore or something like that, but it was. it was evans voice. intonation and everything. he told me to jump, then again, and again, the same lone word, the same intonation, same everything, like a record stuck on repeat. over and over. he wouldnt stop. i tried to drag him away but as soon as i touched him he started yelling at me, talking about the fall and the mist and the heights and the clouds, rambling like a madman. i tried to pull him away from the edge that had clearly made uim like this but he wouldnt budge, just kept yelling at me about the sky and the sea and the horizon and the wind rushing past so fast it snaps your neck and i couldnt do anything to stop him. what would you have done, reader? we had been lost for god knows how long on this impossible path with no way home and now evan had begun to go fucking crazy - what do you want me to do? sit with him? try to calm him down? whatever happened to us is clearly not fucking normal and whatever happened to us is the same thing that did that to him. it clearly wants us dead, or something close to dead. i dont want to die. more than anything i dont want to die. call me selfish because i probably am and call me a monster because i know i am but i would rather kill the man i love with my bare hands than let him kill me. he wouldve killed me. they was no way he wouldntve. it was self defence. it was self defence. it doesnt matter now. i dont think anyone is gonna find this. i think im gonna die here. fuck this place and fuck you all. i dont want to starve to death, but id rather do that than give this place what it wants and hurl myself off that cliff. if anyone finds me, please look kindly on me. i have done a tragic and useless thing and now im going to starve on a mountain that shouldnt exist next to the rotting corpse of the man i loved and killed. the code to the safe in my closet is 6673 and i want all my money given to my sister, if she will accept it. tell her im sorry, and tell everyone im sorry and that i love them. i did what i could. the mist is colder than death.